2.3 – Glow Cloud

And now, the news.

Have any of our listeners seen the glowing cloud that has been moving in from the west? Well, John Peters, you know, the farmer, he saw it over the western ridge this morning. Said he would have thought it was the setting sun if it wasn’t for the time of day. Apparently, the cloud glows in a variety of colors, perhaps changing from observer to observer, although all report a low whistling when it draws near.

One death has already been attributed to the Glow Cloud. But listen, it’s probably nothing. If we had to shut down the town for every mysterious event that at least one death could be attributed to, we’d never have time to do anything, right?

That’s what the Sheriff’s Secret Police are saying, and I agree. Although I would not go so far as to endorse their suggestion to “Run directly at the cloud, shrieking and waving your arms, just to see what it does.”

2.9 – Glow Cloud

This is probably nothing, listeners, but John Peters, you know, the farmer, he reports that the Glow Cloud is directly over Old Town Night Vale, and it appears to be raining small creatures upon the earth. Armadillos, lizards, a few crows… that kind of thing.

Fortunately, the animals appear to be dead already, so the Night Vale Animal Control Department has said it should be a snap to clean those up. They just have to be tossed on the eternal animal pyre in Mission Grove Park.

So if that’s the worst Glow Cloud has for us, I say, go ahead and do your daily errands. Just bring along a good, strong umbrella, capable of handling falling animals up to, say, ten pounds. More on the Glow Cloud as it continues to crawl across our sky.

And hey, here’s a tip: take your kids out, and use the cloud’s constantly mutating hue to teach him or her the names of colors. It’s fun, and it shows them the real-life applications of learning.