A great howling was heard from the Night Vale Post Office yesterday. Postal workers claim no knowledge, although passers-by described the sound as being a little like “a human soul being destroyed through black magic.”
The Indian Tracker [sic]– now, I don’t know if you’ve seen this guy around– he’s the one that appears to be of maybe, Slavic origin? yet wears an Indian headdress out of some racist cartoon and claims to be able to read tracks on asphalt.
He appeared on the scene, and swore that he would discover the truth. No one responded because it’s really hard to take him seriously in that headdress of his.
The Apache Tracker– and I remind you that this is that white guy who wears the huge and cartoonishly inaccurate Indian headdress– has announced that he has found some disturbing evidence concerning the recent incident at the Night Vale Post Office, which has been sealed by the City Council since the great screaming that was heard from it a few weeks ago.
He said that, using “ancient Indian magics,” he slipped through Council security, into the Post Office, and observed that all the letters and packages had been thrown about as in a whirlwind… that there was the heavy stench of scorched flesh… that the words written in blood on the walls said “MORE TO COME” and “SOON.”
Can you believe this guy said he used “Indian magics”? What an asshole.
Silence is golden. Words are vibrations. Thoughts are magic. Welcome to Night Vale.